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Should I fight for sole custody?

On Behalf of | Dec 3, 2020 | Child Custody |

The simple answer to this question is “probably not.” It is true that the idea of having sole custody and not needing to create a co-parenting agreement with your ex-spouse may sound very enticing. However, there are multiple reasons why joint custody is so common in spite of the common frustrations associated with it.

Overall, it is generally a bad idea to try and fight for sole custody unless there is a clear and present danger to the child otherwise. According to Custody Change, fighting for sole custody has the disadvantages of putting all of the decision-making in the hands of strangers, and there’s the distinct possibility of it backfiring.

Why does fighting for sole custody remove decision-making powers from me?

If you are going to fight for sole custody, it is highly likely that you will go to trial over it if your ex-spouse objects. This means that the ultimate end decision will rest in the hands of judges and attorneys who do not have a direct relationship with the child or children in question.

It is better for parents to take the reins and make these decisions on behalf of their children, as the parents know the children best. But if the parents cannot collaborate on decision-making, then the power transfers to the courts.  

How could it backfire? 

Unless you have evidence of extreme situations in the family home that would necessitate separating the children from the other parent, fighting for sole custody can paint you in a bad light. Namely, it shows the court that you have a marked unwillingness to parent with your ex-spouse and at least try to do what is in the best interest of the child.